Cross to Bear
by Ryker Strom
Summary: Sebastian Smythe is willing to give up everything to save Blaine Anderson, even if it means risking his own life and changing the past. This is a sequel to "Into the Gloom".


_**A/N: **This fic is inspired by a very lovely SeBlaine animated gif. It's a sequel to "Into the Gloom" __and is based on the Russian fantasy/horror tetralogy "The Watch Series". You do NOT need to read the tetralogy to understand the fic, but it's recommended that you "Into the Gloom" first to get a little bit of background. Believe me when I say that this one is way better than "Into the Gloom" - not that ITG is bad or anything_. _I also have a Tumblr account where I take prompts and talk about my other WIP. I'd be honored if you can follow me at "rykerstrom(.)tumblr(.)com"._

* * *

CROSS TO BEAR

It hurt to breathe. It felt like his lungs were on fire. Actually, it hurt everywhere. Sebastian knew that he was badly hurt, but he had to go on. He was so close to his goal.

It wasn't a fair fight. There were too many of them and only one of him. However, Sebastian knew that he didn't have a choice. He had to obtain the Chalk of Fate; it was the only way the damage could be reversed. It was the only way that he could turn back time. It was the only way that he could save Blaine.

As he finally reached the top of the stairs, he found what he was looking for – the Chalk of Fate - the only thing in this universe that could reverse time and undo the chain of events caused by the individual who wielded it.

And it was currently in Kurt Hummel's possession. Kurt Hummel, who stood on the opposing side in the struggle between the Light and the Dark.

"Kurt," Sebastian called out. "I'm going to need you to hand that to me."

Sebastian would do everything he could to save Blaine, even if it meant doing so at the cost of his own life.

* * *

_3 MONTHS AGO_

"Oh my god, Sebastian! What happened to you?"

"I, uh …" Sebastian looked down. It was quite simple to see why Blaine reacted the way he did. Sebastian would've reacted the same way as well if he saw someone coming through the door with a large blood stain on his shirt. "It's not my blood."

"What happened?" As if not quite believing Sebastian, Blaine was trying to examine Sebastian the best way he could.

"Ran into a rogue Dark Others on my way here, kind of have to kick his ass a bit." Sebastian sighed. "I'm sorry, I don't think we'll make it to the restaurant on time."

"Forget about the reservation," Blaine's eyes were full of worry. "We have to get you out of this shirt."

Sebastian let Blaine lead him up the stairs into his room.

"I don't have anything that'd fit you." Blaine paused. "I think Cooper left some clothes behind when he moved, be right back."

_Cooper._ The very name filled Sebastian with guilt. _Blaine still doesn't know._

"These should fit you better," Blaine's voice snapped Sebastian out of his thoughts.

"Thanks." Sebastian could feel Blaine's eyes on him as he changed out of his bloody shirt. "Look, Blaine. I—"

The rest of his sentence was swallowed by a kiss.

"You scared me, Sebastian." Blaine's face was buried in Sebastian's chest. "When you walked in earlier, I thought … I thought they did something to you."

"They didn't." Sebastian put his arms around Blaine. "You know I'm a lot tougher than that. There's a good reason I'm in the Night Watch."

"That's exactly what I'm talking about," Blaine looked up, concern written all over his face. "It's so dangerous. Every time you have to go on an assignment, I worry."

"But I'm fine, aren't I? I'll become a Great One someday and I'll become invincible." Sebastian tried to reassure Blaine.

"I just … I just don't want you to do this," Blaine said in a small voice.

"I'm sorry I ruined tonight." Sebastian felt awful. It had been exactly one year to the day that he and Blaine had started dating. One year might not seem like much for adults, but for teenagers like them, it was an important milestone. "I'm sorry I made you upset."

"No, you didn't." There was something in Blaine's eyes, as though he was trying to make up his mind. "Let's skip dinner."

"I thought we were already going to cancel the reservation?"

"No, I mean …" Sebastian saw the familiar blush creeping up Blaine's face. "Let's skip altogether."

"Altogether?" Sebastian echoed.

"I want to give you your anniversary present now." Blaine took Sebastian's hands into his and steered them toward the direction of his bed. "I mean, if you want it."

_Oh. _

"Yes." Sebastian breathed out.

* * *

He felt fingers gently brushing along his face, caressing tenderly. There was only one person in the world that would be doing this. Sebastian opened his eyes and was greeted the most radiant smile he had ever seen.

_Blaine._

"Hi." Blaine grinned. There was no mistaking what that look in his eyes meant.

_He loves me. He actually loves me._

"Hi."

It was always mesmerizing to look at Blaine. The way his eyes would twinkle when he was happy; the way his face would light up when he was pleased. Sebastian was certain that he had never seen a more gorgeous sight.

"How did you sleep?"

"Like a log. How long have you been staring at me?"

"Ten, maybe fifteen minutes?" Blaine looked a bit sheepish. "Not trying to be creepy, but you're really pretty when you're asleep."

"Pretty?" Sebastian tried to digest the words. "I'll take it as a compliment, then."

_I just don't want this moment to end._

In spite of Sebastian's mishap with a rogue Dark One, last night had turned out perfectly. Even though they didn't have a romantic dinner at a restaurant, what they ended up doing was far more intimate and special than any dinner would ever be. The sight of Blaine, debauched and spread out under him, groaning and gasping as Sebastian pushed into him again and again; the numerous declarations of love that followed as they basked in their afterglow; were far more meaningful than any romantic dates and extravagant plans.

"What's wrong?" Blaine cupped Sebastian's face before leaning in for a kiss. "You seem distracted."

"I'm fine." Sebastian mustered a small smile. "You tired me out."

"Did I, now?" There was a faint blush on Blaine's face. "Maybe I should do the topping next time."

"There's a next time?" It was meant as a joke, but Blaine didn't catch it.

"What do you mean?" There was a hint of worry in Blaine's voice. Sebastian had to once again remind himself of Blaine's insecurity.

"I'm just teasing you." Sebastian pulled Blaine closer to him. "I still can't believe this is happening."

"Why not?" Blaine rested his head on Sebastian's shoulder.

"Well, after your comments about the sins of pre-marital sex and sodomy, I was expecting semi-permanent dry spells."

"I've only commented on it once, and you remembered?" There was amazement in Blaine's voice. Sebastian didn't have to look to know that Blaine was smiling.

"Of course. That was the day you agreed to be my boyfriend."

_It was also the day that I found out we're the same._

"That was also the day you saved me from those vampires." Blaine added. "It had been a great roller coaster ride ever since."

"Yes, it has."

"You and me against the world." Blaine gave Sebastian a sidelong glance and smiled.

Actually, that was what Sebastian was worried about. What if it wasn't going to be Blaine and him against the world? What if it ended up being him against Blaine in the end?

The fact that Blaine hadn't chosen a side yet worried Sebastian. He was almost certain that when it did come time for Blaine to choose, he would choose the side of the Light; but it was never a guarantee. And then a few weeks ago, something happened to further Sebastian's fears.

"_What do you mean he may choose the Dark side?" Sebastian demanded. This was no joking matter._

"_Just calm down," his mother gestured for Sebastian to sit down. "It was many generations ago, we only found out about this recently; but even his brother chose the Dark side."_

"_His brother?" Sebastian thought that Blaine's brother was a normal human being._

"_Sebastian …" he saw his mother sighing. "Remember two weeks ago when I said I needed you to collect something for me for one of my missions?"_

"_That was for Cooper?" Shock and horror dawned on Sebastian. "You mean … I helped you hand Cooper over to the Inquisition?"_

"_Sebastian, Cooper Anderson violated the terms of the treaty agreed upon between Dark and Light," his mother tried to explain. _

"_Mom, I can't keep this from Blaine. I've become an accessory to this whole thing."_

"_It has to be done. This was not a decision for us to make."_

"_But that was Blaine's brother." Sebastian shook his head in disbelief. "Does Blaine even know?"_

"_No, Sebastian. As far as Blaine's concerned, Cooper is still overseas and a normal human being," his mother continued. "You have to understand this. Blaine's ancestors chose the Dark side, and his own brother chose the Dark side; it all runs in the family."_

"_Blaine can't—There's no way he'll choose that side!" Sebastian ran his hand through his hair, something he did whenever he was nervous or frustrated. "I'm not going to break up with him because of some theory!"_

"_I'm not saying you should, honey." The look on his mother's face was sympathetic with a hint of sadness. "But it just won't end well if that happens. Look at what happened to the Hummels."_

"_We're not the Hummels." Sebastian said through gritted teeth. "Just because one of Blaine's ancestors and his own brother chose the side of the Dark doesn't mean that he will. Blaine's too good for that!"_

"_Sebastian—"_

"_No, mom." Sebastian shook his head. "I'm not going to give up over assumptions. Even if he decided to choose the Dark side, it doesn't mean we can't be together."_

"_Sebastian, Light Others and Dark Others cannot maintain a long-term relationship. You know that."_

"_Blaine's different," Sebastian argued. "Can we please not talk about this anymore?"_

"_I'm just worried about you," Sebastian felt his mother's hand on his shoulder. _

"_I know."_

"Earth to Sebastian Smythe!" Blaine waved his hand in front of Sebastian. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm sorry. Still re-living last night," Sebastian felt a pang of guilt for lying, but this was a subject that couldn't be broached. "You were really hot."

"Well, you weren't too bad yourself." Sebastian noted the blush that was evident on Blaine's face.

"So, I'm just 'pretty' and that's it?" Sebastian raised his eyebrows. "I'd like to think that I'm beautiful, gorgeous, or dashing, you know."

"Fishing for compliments, are we?" Blaine smiled. "You're all of the above and more."

"Now that's more like it."

"You're impossible sometimes!" Blaine's eyes looked golden brown in the light. "I love you, you know that? I meant it when I said it last night. I just love you so much."

"So do I," Sebastian admitted readily and pulled Blaine on top of him. "Now, how about you follow through with what you said earlier?"

"Okay." The expression on Blaine's face was that of love and adoration. "I'll take care of you this time."

Sebastian closed his eyes.

* * *

_2 MONTHS AGO_

Sebastian had never liked being in the Gloom. It was, well, gloomy. This realm that existed outside of the human world often made Sebastian think of sorrow. There were other levels of Gloom, he had been told, but this first level was always the one that his kind would venture into when it came time to choose a side.

Sebastian really didn't want to be here, certainly not under these circumstances.

"How could you?" The hurt was evident in Blaine's voice. "You, of all people?"

"Blaine, let me expl—"

"No!" There were unshed tears in those amber eyes. "You knew, you knew this whole time!"

"I—I couldn't tell you." Sebastian tried to explain.

"I trusted you and you betrayed me," Blaine words dripped with such venom that it made Sebastian flinch.

"Blaine I-"

"Tell me, Sebastian," Blaine interrupted him again. "Was what Kurt said true? Was that what you did? You owe me this much!"

It was painful to see Blaine this way, but Sebastian knew he owed Blaine an answer.

"Yes, I … I knew about Cooper for a while now." Sebastian took a deep breath. "And yes, I did … and I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? You're _sorry_?" Blaine's voice rose in anger. "You helped your mother hand my brother to the Inquisition. My own brother!"

"He violated the treaty, Blaine! He killed a lot of innocent people!" Sebastian argued. "If my mother didn't do it, someone else would!"

"Coop would never do that!" Blaine shook his head vehemently. "He's innocent. I know my own brother."

"Blaine, I—"

"When we were together … That first night," Blaine wiped at his eyes with the back of his hand. "You already knew, didn't you?"

"Yes." Sebastian looked away. He couldn't bear to look at those eyes right now.

"Damn you, Sebastian." There was a clear tremor in Blaine's voice. "Damn you!"

"Do you believe me now?" Kurt finally spoke up. "I wouldn't lie to you about something like this. Not all Dark Others are as bad as the Night Watch liked to make us out to be."

"I loved you, Sebastian." The pain in Blaine's voice was absolutely heart-wrenching. "I trusted you. I … You lied to me."

Sebastian cringed at the past tense and looked up. "I love you too, Blaine. That wasn't a lie, and it's still the truth now."

There was silence as those words hung in the air.

"I'll get my brother back." Blaine spoke up finally.

_No, he can't mean what I think he means._

"Kurt, we're in the Gloom now, aren't we?"

"Yes, we are." Kurt nodded.

"And I can choose while I'm in the Gloom?"

"Yes."

"Blaine, please." Sebastian pleaded. "Don't do this."

"I choose the Dark," The look in those eyes was pained. "I will be a mage, just like Sebastian."

The look on Kurt's face was that of victory.

"Blaine," Sebastian took a step forward.

"Stay away," Blaine hissed. "We're not on the same side anymore, Sebastian."

To Sebastian's dismay, Blaine took a step back and disappeared into the mirror. He had left the Gloom and returned to the human realm.

"Blaine, wait!" It was too late.

"It hurts when it's being done to you, doesn't it?" Kurt's voice was cold.

"Why, Kurt? Why did you do it?" Sebastian might not have always been on the friendliest terms with Kurt Hummel, but he had never done anything to wrong him.

"Why?" Kurt raised his eyebrows. "You dare to ask me why?"

"I haven't done anything to you."

"Your Night Watch took my father away." Anger was evident in those stormy blue eyes. "My father was all I had. He had been nothing but helpful to you."

"That … that was the Inquisition."

"I don't give a damn who. If it weren't for you and your family, my father would still be here."

"Kurt, I—"

"See you later, Night Watcher." Kurt took a step toward the mirror. "From now on, it's us against you."

"No," Sebastian shook his head. "No, I can't."

"You'll probably change your mind if Blaine challenges you one day, and I'm sure he will." Kurt's tone was icy. "I'm going to teach him everything I know. Revenge is a funny thing, isn't it?"

With a triumphant smile, Kurt left the Gloom.

_This can't be happening._

Sebastian was alone in the Gloom. He knew that he couldn't stay in that realm for too long as it would drain too much of his energy, but he needed to think. Sebastian knew that there had to be something he could do to fix this. He refused to accept that this would be the way things ended. He was one of the Others, which meant there would always be a way.

_If there's a way I could turn back time. If there's a way that none of this had happened. If there's something I could do to change history._

Sebastian knew that turning back time and changing history would come at a great cost. He also knew that if he became a Great One, he could acquire such power provided that he made certain sacrifices.

_I'll do whatever it takes to get Blaine back. The rest … doesn't matter._

And if Blaine challenged him before that, Sebastian knew that he would rather give Blaine his life than to hurt him.

* * *

"Kurt, just hand it over." Sebastian reached out, ignoring the sharp pain in his ribs. "Please."

"No!" The stormy blue eyes that met his were filled with tears. "It has to work. It has to!"

"The Chalk of Fate doesn't work if you weren't responsible for what happened," Sebastian tried to explain. "You didn't cause this."

"I have to bring him back!" Kurt cried. He turned away from Sebastian and tried to scribble on the wall with the Chalk. "I have to bring my dad back, it all comes down to this."

"If you give it to me, I can fix that." Sebastian closed his eyes as a wave of dizziness hit him. He was losing way too much blood way too quickly. "Your father was taken away after Cooper. We can turn back time."

Sebastian saw Kurt pause.

"You're going to use the Chalk for that?" There was a trace of disbelief in Kurt's voice. "You're going to undo all this? Including Cooper's capture?"

"Yes," Sebastian confirmed as he tried to ignore the pool of blood that was slowly growing in size under him. "Please give me the Chalk."

Kurt looked down at his hand. "How do I know you can be trusted?"

"You don't," Sebastian took a step forward and gasped in pain. He was dying, he knew it. "But if you don't give me the Chalk before the Inquisition get here, it'll be the end of us anyway."

"You promise that you'll investigate?" Kurt's grip on the Chalk was so tight that his knuckles were turning white. "You promise you'll save my dad?"

"Yes, I'll investigate everything," Sebastian promised. " I'll get to the bottom of it. You have my word."

"All this, just to get Blaine back?"

"Yes." Sebastian felt his vision getting blurry. He had to hang on, just for a few moments longer. "Kurt, I'm begging you. They'll be here soon."

"You love him, don't you?" Kurt's voice was quiet.

"He's everything to me." Sebastian admitted.

Sebastian saw Kurt hesitating for a moment, as though weighing his options; and then a look of understanding crossed over his face.

"I'm sorry about everything, Sebastian." Kurt handed to Chalk to him.

"So am I." Sebastian closed his hand around the Chalk; it felt cold to his touch. "I'll fix it."

_This is it. _

Sebastian turned to the wall with his last ounce of strength. It felt difficult to concentrate and focus, and he wondered if that was what it felt like when one was about to die. Sebastian pressed the Chalk of Fate to the wall and started writing.

It happened instantaneously.

Sebastian felt the world fall away around him quickly; everything was moving backwards around him as though someone had pressed the "rewind" button on a movie. And then, he was back in that pivotal moment in the living room of his house when his mother sought his assistance on that one mission.

"Sebastian, can you go pick up that package for me?" His mother asked. "It's against protocol for me to pick it up."

"No, mom. I can't."

"Excuse me?"

"Cooper Anderson's innocent."

"How did you—" Sebastian saw his mother's surprise when he showed her the Chalk of Fate. "Where did you get that?"

"It's … a long story." Sebastian put the Chalk of Fate on the table. "But this should prove to you that I know what would happen in the future if you hand Cooper over to the Inquisition."

His mother was silent.

"Mom, please believe me. I already know that this won't end well; there's something much bigger at work." Sebastian looked at his mother pleadingly. "This is big. Bigger than all of us."

"You know this will bring us danger, Sebastian." The worry in his mother's eyes said it all. "If the Inquisition knows what you did, and they probably already do…"

"Before I used the Chalk of Fate, the Inquisition was after me," Sebastian explained. "They've been after me ever since I set out to find the truth."

"Then that means someone within the Inquisition is involved somehow, and we can trust no one about this," Sebastian saw his mother eyeing at the Chalk. "We can't let this fall into the wrong hands."

"I'll safeguard it. No one would ever suspect me." Sebastian decided. "The Inquisition has no recollection of what happened because I was the one who used the Chalk. Only the person using it can remember. This will be my cross to bear."

"You'll put yourself in grave danger if they ever find out, Sebastian." His mother shook her head in disagreement. "I can't let you do this."

"Mom, I have to." Sebastian argued. "As far as the Chalk is concerned, nobody knows where it is; and they won't find it."

The silence weighed in the air like a heavy cloak. And then, Sebastian saw his mother moving toward him and pulling him into a tight embrace.

"They say you'll become a Great One one day, I can already see it in you." His mother said finally. "I'm proud of you, Sebastian."

"Thank you, mom."

A vibration in his pocket caught Sebastian's attention and he pulled out his cell phone.

From: Blaine (8:43pm)  
Got the reservation we wanted for our anniversary. Mark your calendar!

Sebastian smiled when he saw the message.

_No matter what happens, everything will be all right._

(END/TBC?)

* * *

_**Addendum:**_ _I'm considering making this a trilogy to tie up the conspiracy regarding the Inquisition and also to ensure that SeBlaine is happily ever after (have to make sure Blaine chooses the Light side after all), but it all depends on whether you guys want me to continue. The third fic, if I decide to write it, will definitely have full blown SeBlaine sex and switching. This takes a lot of effort to write because the world of the "Watches" is very complex. By the way, the SeBlaine Gif that I'm referring to can be found here: "rykerstrom(.)tumblr(.)com/post/20954167256/pretty-gah-i-feel-like-writing-a-fic-on-this". I also have a Tumblr account where I take prompts and talk about my other WIP. I'd be honored if you can follow me at "rykerstrom(.)tumblr(.)com". Lastly, if you like this fic, please rec it and spread the word. It's always hard for a niche writer to get noticed. Thanks again for reading._


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